DOGE Targets the Christian Music Industry, Promises Radical Purge of Wasteful Songs

DOGE has quickly become one of the most divisive forces in the country in recent months. While its supporters praise its swift actions in reducing government waste, fraud, and abuse, critics warn that essential services are being slashed without sufficient consideration. But one thing is clear DOGE shows no signs of slowing down, and now, Elon Musk and his team of young tech-savvy disruptors have set their sights on one of the last bastions of unchecked excess–the Christian Music Industry. Their mission? To cut what they consider a bloated and wasteful release schedule.

“There’s just too much music,” said Derek, a lead technician who has been working grueling 120-hour weeks without daylight, or lunch, for the past two months. “I’ve reviewed thousands of releases, and we’re barely scratching the surface.”

“There’s just too much,” said Derek, a lead technician who has been working 90 hour workdays without[…]

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